Scott Samuelson: Counting Lights

The author of “The Deepest Human Life" on the Dao of wrestling and why “Reversal is the movement of the Way.”

By Scott Samuelson

“Counting lights” is an expression that wrestlers use for fighting off being pinned—when you’re on your back, arching as hard as you can, and all you can see is the gymnasium lights. 

I’ll never forget this one time that I was counting lights. It was during a tournament hosted by my high school in rural Iowa, literally in the middle of a cornfield. I was wrestling for fifth place—considering there were only ten kids in my bracket to begin with, not exactly a glorious finish. I’d been up on points the whole match. With just a few seconds left, my opponent threw me to my back. The score was now tied. If he pinned me, he’d win. 

After a whole day of wrestling, I was exhausted. Part of me was thinking, “What’s the difference between fifth and sixth place anyway? This guy just got lucky. Everyone would understand if I got pinned.” But part of me knew that my dad was watching. I unclenched my eyes, arched for all I was worth, and started counting the caged lights overhead: …